Welcome to Newsletter ♾️ sideways (8)

Welcome to the September edition! September has been a LONG month. Long month meaning good but also tiring. I feel like this is the first month I have struggled to come up with a topic for the newsletter, and not for lack of ideas, but rather, the inability to decide on which topic I want to drone on about (funny enough, analysis paralysis was also a topic I was toying with writing about). I feel I have a lot I want to talk about, but not enough juice for each of the topics, so I’m just gonna start writing and see where it takes me.

BUT! I DO HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT THAT I WANT TO INTRODUCE TO THIS NEWSLETTER. KEEP READING TO FIND OUT 🤪👀🤩🎣🐐💃

Invite Mara to Tea

This book I am reading described a parable that featured the question: “What are you unwilling to feel?” As I read it, I immediately answered in my head, “Pain, sadness, suffering, anger, being upset, etc.” and a flurry of other negatively charged emotions. But then, a second later, I realized that, I don’t want to necessarily be happy, go-lucky all the time. I want to experience the ups and downs of life, I want to get sad so that I can be happy again, and feel pain so that I can overcome it. I don’t want to walk on sand all the time, sometimes I want a path of hot coals so that I can appreciate the sand better. Or even, so that I may re-experience the blessing of that first step on sand once again. Or even, so that I can learn to make any flooring as comfortable as a path of sand.

I don’t want to feel in pain or feel sad, but if you gave me the opportunity to never feel any of those things, I’d decline it. And none of that seems logical to me. If I actively fear suffering, for example, then I should want to avoid it. But if I don’t wish to never feel suffering again, then that means I welcome it. But I don’t. See my confusion?

I’ll give you an example – I have recently started not to like running. So much so that I mentally agonize over having to run long mileage days before I even have to do it. Albeit this is a mundane and privileged example, but just bear with me for a second. I hate the pain of running, but if you ask me if I never want to run again, I’d say absolutely not. There will be a day, I suppose, where I would do anything to feel that stinging, agonizing, torturous burn of a run. Right now, I dread it, but in the future, when I no longer can run, I’ll miss it. The pain I’m feeling now is something I eventually will beg to relive again.

(And this extends beyond the metaphor of running)

So, why do we feel pain? Physical, emotional, pain. Why are there things that cause us to be upset? There must be some reason. I don’t know. I find myself sometimes wishing I was never fearful or was never in pain or was never upset. But then I got hit with this question and I realized, maybe I do want to experience these negative emotions, so that I can experience everything that life has to offer.

I do believe we should feel all these feelings. We should be open to those around us, let our guard down, be vulnerable, and welcome people into our lives, accepting that they might not be there forever. My quixotic search for infinite happiness leads to my inability to understand the duality of happiness and sadness; I cannot expect to be happy at some point without also expecting to be sad at some point by that same thing. If the addition of something may help me, then the subtraction of that something may hurt me. And that is a risk we all have to be willing to take.

So is it better to live a life of bliss or to get roughed up a bit? I don’t know, I think the answer is #2, but then again, I go back and forth. I do wholeheartedly believe in opening yourself up to the world. I suppose that means accepting the good with the bad and the bad with the good.

Ignorance is bliss but bliss can also be ignorance. To feel pain is a blessing, and we should welcome both positive and negative feelings because one cannot exist without the other. If we don’t emerge from this life without a couple of scuff marks, bumps, and bruises, do we even have any proof that we lived?

P.S. I just watched Dead Poets Society so of course Professor Keating is my new idol.

And now, for my big VasaVita innovation!

Okay calling it an “innovation” is a huge stretch. But, I want to try something. I want to hear YOUR thoughts. So, I had this idea. Below is a link to a blank Google Doc. If you feel comfortable, I’d love for you to click on the doc and add your thoughts. It can be about this edition, about something in the past, or about anything else. Treat it like a Canvas discussion forum except its all anonymous, completely optional, and should actually be good vibes. I just wanted some way to get a two-way street of communication, and so I had this idea. You can write one word, one sentence, one paragraph, an entire novel, or simply read what others have to say. It doesn’t have to be that even! It can be a link to a song you like, a poem that resonates with you, or an image that uplifts you. I just want to hear some of your opinions, see some of your thoughts, and experience some of your ideas about anything and everything, just like you so patiently do with mine every newsletter.

Once again, it is completely anonymous and intended to be a wholesome, fun, uniting initiative to create a sense of community. Would love to see what you add and how you view the world :)

Thank you for listening to my spiel!

You know the drill: everything I write here is something I am actively working on improving and implementing within myself. Writing them out also helps me to visualize what to work on and how to do it. And having you as my audience holds me accountable.

If you have any thoughts, comments, or feedback, please dish it to me! I’d love to know how I can improve. I am glad to have you here on my VasaVita journey.

If you want to talk more about anything I discussed in my newsletters, or want to learn more about VasaVita, check out my website below!

See you in October!

And last but not least, the following growth check!

You all know the drill now: in the sprit of transparency and holding myself accountable, I include my audience count here to keep you apprised on my growth. We only got 1 newcomer in September, but hey, it’s better than 0!

Looking forward to ~hopefully~ more growth in October! If you have any ideas or tips, feel free to share!